Sunday (Gaming)

by Bones , The Last City, Earth, Sol System, Wednesday, July 22, 2026, 11:43 (12 hours, 52 minutes ago) @ Bones
edited by Bones, Wednesday, July 22, 2026, 12:09

SUNDAY
LOCAL CALENDAR: MAY 24, 2026
MILITARY CALENDAR: SEPTEMBER 23, 2552

Slipping out from underneath the warm blackness of slumber, I become aware of the weight of my corporeal form and already know that I’ve slept in late – or rather, later than the rest of my stay thus far. A small moral dilemma burdens me, weighed between rolling back over or rising to spend more quality time with my friends. After some short but intense deliberation, the latter wins. I don’t bother looking at the clock, and saunter out past the closed doors of several bedrooms to see whom else might have awakened. A paltry few have summoned the strength to arise after such a late night, and we share chit-chat and breakfast as our resident sleepyheads stagger in one-by-one for coffee and company.

In keeping with our traditional LAN schedules of past, Sunday usually sees much more unstructured fun – whether that be visiting nearby tourist attractions, participating in unforeseen ‘death march’ hiking excursions, or in this case the simple joy of playing some other titles with each other.

Malagate
“I’ll never forget rediscovering my love of Mass Effect 3’s multiplayer mode, and playing some good ol' Iron Brigade with Pixel Fox, Revenant, and Stabbim.”

The late morning sees bouts of other games break out, as well as a couple campaign mission run-throughs and firefight sessions. Team Schooly D dives back into matchmaking for the chance to redeem themselves now that their ban has expired. Malagate throws biotic missiles as an adept Volus in Mass Effect 3. With the help of my co-host and several other guests, we begin preliminary breakdown of the display tables and associated props, prepping them for transport the following day. After a short time passes, however, I begin to feel a change in the wind and the air grows heavy – I realize the time is nigh. Sequestered away in the rear of the dining room beyond, the whirring and ratcheting sounds of power-tool construction dance into my eardrums and beckon me to investigate. I obey and am surprised to find my co-host Revenant similarly entranced when I arrive. With a knowing gaze and subtle nod of concurrence, we return to the event room and gather everyone to their gaming stations.

PADDY CUP 2026
LODGE OF THE EAGLE’S CREST
LOCAL CALENDAR: 5TH YEAR OF THE ROBOTNIK

In accordance with a tradition that claims roots stretching all the way back to the Kentucky Fried LAN in 2013, so again does Padraig host his own lovably-deranged series of eccentric mini-games with equally esoteric prizes. This year, however, no one expects what breaches the doorway; the man from the City of Steel erects his own iron contraption – a freakin’ spinning wheel standee. I can only provide these eye-witness accounts of the madness that ensues but rest assured, dear reader, the ridiculous laughter and merriment were far greater even that what’s depicted here –

Contest: ‘Sanic Race’ on ‘Despetagon’
Description: A thrilling mongoose race along a custom-forged Halo Reach map created by Padraig back in 2011, featuring diabolical shortcuts booby-trapped with landmines that even the architect himself doesn’t remember creating.
Winner: Nart
Prize: Three-Tier ‘Sanic’ Trophy!

Contest: ‘Rocket Rat Race’ on Breakpoint
Description: A slightly-less thrilling but no less explosive round of Rocket Race around the frozen slopes and winding tunnels of Halo Reach’s Breakpoint!
Winner: Schooly D
Prize: The ‘Halo 3 Rat’ Sticker

Contest: "What Halo Quote Am I Thinking Of?”
Description: Exactly what’s on the wheel – try your best to guess which quote is bouncing around in the ephemeral chaos that is Paddy’s brain!
Answer: “Sir, finishing this fight.”
Winner: Snipe
Prize: ‘Sir, Drinky Me Slurpy’ Sticker

Physical Challenge: Hug Contest
Description: Exactly what’s on the wheel – give Paddy your best hug and he will totally judge them impartially and not immediately cave to the woman who sweet-talks into his ear!
Winner: Syndrome
Prize: ‘Hold Me, Baby’ Sergeant Johnson & Elite Legendary Ending Sticker

Contest: Best LAN Host
Description: Exactly what’s on the wheel – be the best host! Suck it, Revenant and Bluerunner!
Winner: Bones
Prize: The Golden Bone

Contest: What Halo Skull Am I Thinking Of?
Description: Exactly what’s on the wheel – try your best to guess which particular Halo modifier skull that just so happens to be bouncing around in Paddy’s own hollow bone!
Answer: Cowbell Skull
Winner: Bonkle
Prize: Miniature Cowbell Skull Keychain

Physical Challenge: Best Scream
Description: Exactly what’s on the wheel – scream your best scream and you’d better make it mean, because Paddy only wants the best of the best!
Winner: Stabbim
Prize: Golden Goku Figurine

Contest: Most Hungry Award
Description: Participate in a match of Halo 3 FFA Slayer and achieve the most kills, try-hard!
Winner: Bonkle
Prize: Hamburger Art Canvas

Contest: Least Hungry Award
Description: Participate in a match of Halo 3 FFA Slayer and achieve the least kills, loser!
Winner: Cadet
Prize: Small Plastic 4-Piece Chicken Nugget Meal

Contest: Name the Most Recent Meme
Description: Exactly what’s on the wheel – try to name the most recent meme and Paddy will vet the creation date of your answer via the website knowyourmeme.com, if his wireless service loads the page that is!
Winner: Schooly D
Prize: Wax ‘7’ & ‘8’ Birthday Candles

Contest: Winner of Game
Description: Participate in a match of Halo 3 FFA Slayer and win the game, sweaty-mcsweats!
Winner: Pixel Fox
Prize: Miniature Halo 3 Game Case Keychain

Contest: Save One Bullet Award
Description: Participate in a match of Halo 3 Infection and survive the longest, coward!
Winner: Korny Munky
Prize: Large Bullet Casing-Shaped Water Bottle

Eventually, the manic triathlon of absurd gametypes, intense cognitive thought experiments, and demanding physical challenges comes to a finale and we break. Sadly, so does our time with two of our guests, with Pixel Fox and Malagate needing to head out early to catch their flights home. Stabbim has ever so graciously offered to drive them to the airport, so after lining up for manly hugs, we give them a hero’s farewell and chant their names into legend.

While Revenant continues with event teardown, I conscript the ever-faithful KG to assist with procuring nourishment. I’d originally promised myself that I’d take the higher road regarding the weekend’s nutrition and wouldn’t order pizza, but I cave and soon we’re driving off to collect from the local Papa John’s establishment. The drive to the nearby town and back provides a brief respite from the duties of host, and I’m able to appreciate the beautiful scenery of southern Indiana’s springtime. Returning with cheesy-goodness, the group’s hunger is appeased and I employ two supreme intellects to lower the projection screen.

Indulging in a short respite after lunch, conversation drifts back to old forum posts from the before-times and ancient customs night write-ups; Nart guides us through the convoluted web of forum posts and dead links until we find just the right video to tickle our sensibilities.

For the next several hours, our bellies full and spirits high, we continue the ‘un-work’ of dismantling and repacking the various display items and returning the furniture to their rightful storage locations – leaving a small number of consoles and screens available. After months of gentle prodding and encouragement, never once succumbing to underhanded name-calling or bullying, I finally persuade Revenant to give Managed Democracy a chance and he joins me in Helldivers II. With KG providing expert advice from the sideline, we manage to recruit both Fembot and Stabbim unto freedom’s wings, as well. I look up toward the sky with a whimsical expression and a twinkle in my eye; I have done Liberty’s will and fulfilled my recruitment quota for the week.

As the evening turns to night and the last throes of sunlight wane in the distance, I notice the remaining guests have gathered on the front porch to enjoy the cooler weather. After making myself an absolutely stacked deli sandwich, I grab a chair from the dining room and join. The conversation drifts from sharing memories of PAX and other LAN events to our first posts on the HBO forum to Schooly’s existential crisis after being killed by The Guardians to our unfiltered thoughts on the Halo television series to our deepest, darkest desires for the future of Halo. Syndrome distributes some gifts of her own that she’s just finished up during the event – crochet plushie engineers! Once again, I’m grateful just to be sitting in good weather, good conversation, and good company.

With the sun having set and the mosquitos beginning their attack runs, we head back inside for some additional matchmaking in Halo, some eleventh-hour helldives, and an amusing round of BOLL’s own Warthog Launch flash game. As a last-minute order of business, myself and Revenant bestow two special awards – the custom-crafted and hand-painted 11” Master Chief statuettes. For not only tackling the herculean task of cooking for sixteen people but serving absolutely divinely-tasting dishes, the first is awarded to his culinary kingliness – KG. For braving the wilderness of the lands outside his hometown and enduring the combined twelve-hour car ride with Paddy, the second is awarded to ‘Mr. Headshot’ himself – Snipe.